today teacher's day celebration......kind of boring at sum parts....den got another parts very funi lorz....hmm.....the sun is directly on mi.....very de hot.....later after the celebration go n look 4 eleanor.....den meet up wif deborah n waimin dey all.....then go n look for ms johnson....mr kee....n mr ha......dey all at shaw hall.....hahaz....den after tat i go primary school look 4 my teachers.....den saw minglong...judith.....emmeline.....isabel....later....saw reena....jiuyew....den the 4 of us....went round the whole school...looking 4 ms chin n mrs ng(zhuo lao shi).....cannot find....haiz.....so bad....later like go office....ask one of the staff to pass the gifts to them coz we r running out of time lorz....haiz....after that go out wif eleanor...siewhua...waimin....to plaza singapura....watch twins effect two.....hahaz....very funi yet very de touching in sum parts lorz....the story kind of cute....like the men were treated as a dumbells....like they r 4 sale lorx....hahz....still got bid 4 the dumbells de.....very ke lian larz......so hor....u ppl gona watch....it's cool!!!.....hehehz.....
after tat.....shikin came n joined us....den go shop shop....till very tired of the place....den go tampiness mall....yar yar...den meet rachel at the MRT...hehex.....den we go tampiness mall together.....hehex......fun fun....oh yar.....shikin went bugis.....yar....so left the 5 of us.....hmm......we went to the yamaha music shop there watch instruments....fun fun.....go play piano...hehex.....planning to buy piano next time.....den also wana buy horn.....oh gosh.....i think hor buy horn better rite.....haiz....c how...i think next time my mum will allow mi to but horn instead of piano de.....c how la......she wana c how i play my horn b4 she makes any decision......hmm......haiz....if mi still in trumpet...can go n buy le lorz....haiz....nvm....too bad i guess....
den we intent to go take neoprint....den see got so many people...den 4get it.....haiz.....went walk walk walk...den waimin sae she hungry....den wana eat sumthing......den de eleanor sae darren jianxiong they all at yushinoa dere eating....den they sae go there eat lorz....sae hi to them lorz....anything......
go there sit lorz....i very tired.....then like got mild fever....den not in the mood to eat...blah blah blah.....later the guys go le.....den like we all suddenly go siao le lorz.......keep on laughing...den we tok abot the white blood cells....den keep on laughing....hahz.....so funi.....very funi lorx.....hehex......
hmm.....i bought a present juz now b4 we went to eat......we went precious thoughts...my favorite shop!!!....hehex....yar....den mi n rachel saw the garment bag....den we wana buy....hahz....to put our band the uniforms ma....hehex.....the blue nicer.....pink very the *yucks*......then i buy 1st lorz....coz i duno wen mi going to buy....den she buy later.....
[U.n.p.l.e.a.s.a.n.t.D.a.y.I.n.M.y.L.i.f.e]

[i.hate.her]

this is the first time i cried in class today...my heart is totally broken...i try myself to smile...but is very difficult....very difficult...then...my frens try to cheer mi up...yet is like the blow is too big 4 mi to accept...den is like my tears juz keep on flowing...and im totally lost confidient in myself...i was like holding my hp n feel like sms to my seniors n sae sorri coz is like at that point of time i juz totally feel so useless n toopit...and i juz wana give up my interests n concentrate on my studies....but later on i feel that im so selfish...i onli think of myself n i dun care how they feel if i juz quit band...i cannot totally let my failure overcome my life rite...no matter wat i juz have to keep my life going... i cannot juz becoz of one failure i try to commit sucide rite....(i almost did it)... this is not the end of the world rite...haiz...it was like for that moment very hard to accept the fact lorz...haiz...*sob**sob*...feel like crying again...*sniff*...
tml teacher's day celebration.....haiz...duno have to be happy....okok.....think of sumthing good...ok...getting award this saturday.....must smile....smile....smile......CA3 Art get 144/160....is good already.....smile!!! TANYINGYIN U BETA SMILE!!!DUN GIVE MI TAT BLOODY FACE!!!!!....*sob*....i reali wana smile.....but is reali very difficult...i duno wat m i gona do...tml going to see my pri school teacher.....have to smile....smile....then after tat going out wif my frens....so i have to smile...cannot becoz of mi make them sad too!!! TANYINGYIN U BETA SMILE!!!!.....*sob*...haiz...ok....i think enough abot this b4 i reali breakdown....
[...sori eleanor 4 not calling u...]
[b.r.o.k.e.n.h.e.a.r.t]
[n.e.e.d.a.p.e.a.ce.o.f.a.m.i.n.d]
[s.t.u.d.y.c.r.a.z.e]
[y.e.a.r.n.i.n.g.f.o.r.s.u.c.c.e.s.s]
[m.a.y.g.o.d.g.u.i.d.e.m.i.a.l.o.n.g]
[thankiew.for.brightening.up.my.day]
[luv.yar]

now ish 1:22am le...still cant sleep...juz now at 10pm...i read the few new pieces given out today...hmm....till 11...hahaz...waaa!!!...4 the piece...'Chinese Spring Overture' rite...i played the 3rd horn ma...waaa!!!very the different frm the 1st n 2nd horn lorz...first thing first...dey got 3 pages i got onli two....den 4 sum parts la...wen they play i rest...wen they rest....i play....but sum part la...i got the same notes as the 1st horn...
my starting larz...if im not wrong....can sae my part hor...have to follow the trumpets instead of my section lorz...so kind of confusing la...i can sae that hor this piece...i can reali die if i dun practise....n also...i wana complain!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!walau....my the whole piece hor....all those notes n bars all very close to each other...so bars hor can reali sqeeze till the bars hor u can notice very clearly tat ppl got 'tong guo shuo jiao de'...then very the hard to c lorz...n the notes very the sqeezy n 4 mi very hard to sight-read lorz......den i can freak out wan lorz wen i see those notes sqeeze together like tat...i thought the piece is gona be a hard wan.....den the 1st n 2nd horn the scores are much much more easier to see...at least i c le i dun freak out lorz...the bars r equally spread out...much more easier to sight-read....walau so envy....
now...nth to do....read again...haiz....so sianz....pieces getting harder n harder...n those note r getting higher n higher....i have to figure how to reach them lorx....haiz....
....tml monday....got chinese common test...very scared....haiz....study some le....so-so lorx....haiz....also getting my common test results next week...very scared....cant wait 4 the next saturday to cum...
[im.not.going.to.hurt.my.heart.again]
[u.beta.dun.hurt.mi.again]
[dun.give.mi.tat.kind.of.attitude]
[hav.u.notice.tat.u.had.hurt.alot.of.ppl]
[i.hate.you]

hmm...band...todae the band...ok lorz...kind of funi lorz...so-so lorz...
band sounds ok 2dae also...glad glad...haiz...duno wat to write...haiz...feeling kind of down...now listerning to music...my brother sleeping...my mum too...as well as my sick cousin...haiz...today no reali in the good mood 4 anything...coz first thing first my cousin sick...till very de serious...scare my whole family alot....she got a high fever all os a sudden very late last nite....den like she shiver till my mum can sense it lor...she sae like the whole bed trembling lorz...den my cousin vomit 2 times on the mattress....den time is around 4.30am like tat...den my mum wakes up never go to sleep till during the afternoon time tat time then she goes back 2 sleep....haiz...my cousin now ok le lorz...can jump her jump there...haiz...everyone is getting themselves sick...haiz....reali gona take care...
[i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.i hate you.]

hehex...today after school...went out wif eleanor...waimin...n deborah...i went home change coz mi release at 1.15pm today....then eleanor is 1.50pm maz...so later meet them at the aljunied MRT at 2am lorz....
we went to the food court n eat.....den we went to shop 4 the teacher's day present...the 4 of us share to buy presents 4 Ms Johnson, Mr Kee n Mr Ha...our band teachers larz...den also 4 others teachers we have la...hehex...i bought alot of presents including my primary school form teacher n chinese teacher...hehex....Xp...
after tat....we went take neoprint 1st....the machine, 'Karen For Lady' wan....hehex...deborah dun wan to take wif us...she sae she not nice in photo...so sad rite....='(...then she wait outside 4 us lorz....
haiz....later go shop 4 presents again...yea...then i bought a Paper bag...coz too much presents lei....stuff inside the small bag of mine really very wat lorz....den i went Precious Thoughts n bought a bag...hahaz....i put all the gifts i bought...n i looks like a santa...hahaz...
neway...i juz now went Perlin Silver n buy a necklace 4 my aunt...coz she reali help mi alot in the competition thingy n also at the end i won lorz...so reali have to thank her alot...i hope that she will like it...
hahaz...after all those shopping...we went up to the cinema there...outside there la n sit down n rest...also to check whether we got everything we need n also to settle the money problem....den de 4 of us went to take postcards lorz....take so many lorz...i think each of us have at least 80 postcards ba!!!...hahaz....so crasy rite....hehex..
die le...tml got band....i never go band 4 1 week lorz....den hor...heard that got 3 new pieces....1 is 'My Heart Will Go On' n another i think is the 'I Will Survive' thingy lorz....not so sure la....haiz....i hope that everything will be alrite tml....(",)
[I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE U.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU.I HATE YOU]

Hehehex…im sooooo hapi today!!!!! Hehez….i got 3rd prize for the competition!!!!!.....hehez…my name is on the Friday Weekly newspaper dere!!!!...hehez….soooooooooooooooo happiiii!!!!!!!...den next Saturday…..i got to go to the duno wat ‘bao guan’ dere to collect my prize…..im the onli person in sch hu get the prize….=p…..cant wait xia……ssoooooooooooooooooo hapi!!!!!......den have to call my dear seniors to help mi set up my horn le…..hehehxx…..so happppiiiiiiiiii….Xp…..
Hmm….tml got PE…I have to take my PFT….i think so ba…..coz mi never do during the day ma….so have to do tml….so scare….hehez…..nvm lar…..
Juz now went Sweden wif waimin…liling…..n Valerie…….hehehz…..each of us ate the Topless 5….den mi n waimin ordered Ice Mocha and Ice Cappuccino…..hahaz….. my icecream got one flavor got wine de….SUPER NICE LORZ…..hahahz….but lor…we all under-age le….sum more wearing sch uniform dere n eat…hahahz…..nvm. lar….no1 noes rite…=p…
Later…we went to take neoprints…..got 2 new machines…..hehex…..we try out 1…..$10….but very cute lorz…..got wan sofa inside…..den we take……so funi…..hahaz….taking neoprint in a relaxing manner….hahahax…..hehex….den the machine got a lot of time to decorate….hehex….worth it lar…..hehehx…
P.S….Justin came back…….
[s.o..h.a.p.i..t.o.d.a.e]

Hmm…last 2 periods science….got SPA test….i 4get 2dae got lorz….haiz…nvm….it’s over neway…
After school…..went to find joyce chng all over the school….den finally found her…..hmm…coz later we have to go Mast. Music wif ms Johnson n Darren plus Jian Xiong…. We going off after Darren n Jianxiong take their Word Power Test lorz…..haiz…..mi n joyce very the bored lorz….nth to do…..we walk round the school hoping that the 1 hr will pass soon….haiz….in the end we found ourselves sitting on the benches like idiots like that….hahaz….haiz….
After they took their test….the 4 of us went to look 4 Ms Johnson….Ms Johnson pass $10 to Darren and Jianxiong coz we taking Cab….then coz too much people….so have to separate us into two different cabs…….hahaz…on our way there….it rains…..hehez….so suai lorz….haiz….
Wen we reach the shop….Ms Johnson ask we all to get the things we need lorz… hahaz….we in the shop abot 1 hr plus la…den like of funi at times……den after that Ms Johnson treat us drinks…den we went home together taking MRT lorz….while ms Johnson take the train to orchard…..
Hahaz….on our way to Mrt…..hahaz…..we tok abot mr ng….den like we sae we 4get to get a chair 4 mr ng….hahaz….den we tok abot how we broke those chairs n fell from them….den Ms Johnson told us that at the Victoria Theatre…on the way to receive the flowers after the last nite performance…..he trip n fell down the stairs!!...hahaz….den is like Ms Johnson sae why he keep falling down wan….hahahz…..very funi lorz….
Neway….Darren took the things we bought home….hmm…..hu ask him to be the Band Major lorz….so have to take home…
Hmm…..i duno why people was like cuming up to mi or sms mi that I won an award…hmm….they sae wat the Friday weekly thingy…..den I recalled that I got participate one of the event during the June holidays de…..have to do 10 newspaper articles wan n decorate it into a book or wat lorz….hmm…I wonder wat prize I got….told my mum about it too….den she sae c tml wat your Chinese teacher sae lorz….then ask mi to sms her the moment I noe coz she excited also….hmm….reali wondering wat prize I get….hmm…..tml got geo test…gona study!!!!.....

Hahaz….hmmm……today never go band…..so sad rite….hahahz….wadeva it is la…..our class wif faith 2-3 n faith 2-5 went 4 an educational tour at Singapore Polytechnic….hmmm…..the place is really huge lorz…..waaa….can get lost de….the Polytechnic there got…hmm….alot of carparks….Convention Centre…Auditorium…Exhibition Hall…
Adventure Learning Centre…Singapore Polytechnic Graduates’ Guild…Multi Purpose Out-door Courts…Sports Complex…Swimming Pool!!!...Sports Hall…Squash Centre…Baskerball Court…Tennis Court… Student & Alumni Affairs Centre…Multi-Purpose Field…Child Care Centre???....Concourse…Ecogarden…Library…Admin BLDG…Forecourt…Integrated Simulation Centre…Agrotech Centre…hmm…I think that’s about it la……
We are seated at the school’s auditorium…..wif two other schools lorz…..hmm…. wif Yu Hua Sec n Clemeti Town Sec……They let us watch one clip….’The SP Files’…hahaz….so funi lorz…. Den the presenter on the screen is call Darren…..hahahz…..mi n waimin was like laughing lorz….coz that guy Indian maz…so funi lorz….hahaz…..yea….n alvin yap was sitting beside mi…..haiz….=(….kk…..wadeva……kind of fun la……Hey! They r like promoting their school to us lorz…..tell us so much about their school…..hmmm…..ok la….
Den later, they organize a game call…treasure hunt…hmmm…..haiz….ok lorz…..mi waimin…Deborah…n liling…..were like doing the thingy….then in the end…we get ourselves lost lorz….hahahz….hehex…we search 4 a ladies toilet also got difficulties….hahaz…..ok lar….
Later that is prize presentation….hehex….10 prizes in all n out school 5 groups got it…..the top two groups are frm our school too!!! Hehex….our teachers very happy of coz…..n the top grp is from our class!!! Hahahz…..so hapi…..
Later we took Mrt home…..walking pass the school…..saw yuanling hahaz….after band le….den it rains….actually thought of stopping in school 4 a while coz the rain kind of big larz….but we juz dash home…..hehex….

AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Y CANT U 2PIT GUYS JUZ LEAVE MI ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!SO WAT IF IM THE GRP LEADER!!!!!! DOESN'T MEAN I HAVE TO COMPLETE ALL ASSIGNMENTS GIVEN TO OUT GRP RITE!!!!! WAT TO U THINK I M TO U PPL!!!! PLZ!!!! I HAVE ENOUGH OF U PPL!!!! FINE!!! I WILL DO EVERYTHING!!!!! N TELL U GUYS THIS OK, THIS IS THE LAST TIME IM GONA DO EVERYTHING OK!!!!....
HAVING YOU GUYS IN MY GRP REALI SUX ALOT!!! THATS WAT I WAN TO SAE!!!! I DUN CARE WAT U R THINK LE!!!!YOU PPL R JUZ IRRITATING N I HATE U 2 K!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.......................................................................

haiz...i juz have to let it pass...no matter wat...i juz have to do my part as a XX n 2 have faith in myself den to look down on myself...haiz...may all things go smoothly...haiz....

haiz....everything sux!!! i hate all arrangement....teachers......i duno wat they r thinking....haiz....sux lor....k i dun wish to sae any longer....i juz think that everything sux!!! tat all i wana sae....haiz dun even have the mood to eat dinner...ok...fine.....

haiz...now at library wif eleanor...hahaz...pong band....hahahahahahahahahaahhahahahahhaahahhhhahx......so hapi....hahahahaahhahahahaahhahhahahahahahhaahahahahx...no need to see mr ng the bloody old face!!! hahahahahahax.....
k la end here le la....

Hehex….now listerning to Fate Of The Gods….juz bath n eat my dinner…..coz juz now mi the whole afternoon in school…..doing wat….hmm…..band rm today got open ma….i go n practice my horn….frm 2.30-6pm….longer then usually band hours hor!!!...try try onli la….i scared later mi duno how to play next Friday…..mi skipping band this week n on Tuesday….coz got educational tour ma…..haiz…….i skipping band 4 tml is becoz….mi sick abit sick n my mum dun reali allow mi to go plus my backbone still recovering ma…so is 100% cannot go….but after band around 4 plus like tat I will go to pass letter to ms Johnson…. Yaya…..hehex…..kind of fun 2dae in the band rm…..hehez….i get to play the drumset!!! So fun……hehez….i noe how ya play!!! Abit la….not reali tat gd la…hehez…so fun…..den hor Eleanor took deborah’s saxophone and play….she hor….very de pro lorz….she juz take the saxophone and she noe how to play le…..she even noe how to play some of the saxophone solos le!!! *clap* *clap*……clever gal xia…den we play together….mi play kind of lan la…coz long time never play then like play haf way my backbone vry de hurting lorz…..waaaa!!!!! I cant believe I can bear the 2pit pain lorz….now still hurts alittle and also my lips…..coz is like keep on playing n playing den I blast here blast there….hehez….4 the Next Octave……n Fate of the Gods…….Hey Jude……Big Fun In The Sun….blah blah blah…..we play a lot of songs la……hehex…so fun…haiz….tml…..i juz gona sae good luck to my seniors….hope tat they wun kana scoldings from the mr ng larz…..not onli tml….next Tuesday also….hehex….haiz…..
Waa!!!!!.....2dae the maths common test so so lorz….lucky is not as hard as I think larz….i onli duno how to do 3 questions!!!...hehex….i hope that I can still maintain a A….haiz….
Yesterday eng common test hor…..reali duno wat the passage toking abot lorz…..is like the characters inside rite….is like wen u read rite….u thought there were onli 2 people inside…den wen u look at the questions….suddenly got 3 characters….haiz….nvm…4get it….it’s already over rite….neway….i noe how to do the questions ma…..so….nvm lorz…
Waaaaaa….next week science test…..mi going library and study till time’s up den I go school to pass letter to ms Johnson…hmm….got 3 chapters to cover…..
Haiz….i think tml mr ng surely bad mood de…..*scared* *scared*……lucky I not going…hehex…*evil grin*….jkjk….but is like all the sec 4s step down le…..then is like tml is like going to a fresh new start….haiz….so reali have to pray 4 the band tml…..

*sniff* *sniff*....haiz...feeling sick still...*cough* *cough*....tml got english common test...very de scared...coz important paper maz...stress xia....den friday maths....i hope that i wun freak out larz....then mext monday science....scared scared xia...but i hope to get well....
haiz....this saturday band starts le....but hor mi hor....still feeling sick....n weak all over....coz too much medication n also the medication all very the strong de....so is like very de weak...haiz....sianz....den more wrost still is tat next tuesday have ya skip band also....coz got educational tour to Singapore Poly....frm 2.3o-5.30.....den we have to go home on our own lorz...nearest MRT is Dover MRT station!!!...Walau!!! Only Faith2-3, Faith2-4 n Faith2-5 have to go....so 2pit lorz....duno wat the hell is tat....sianz....
haiz...my flu getting worst xia....haiz....every nite the air-con on so cold....of course wun recover de....but my brother likes it maz....so have to wear an extra sweater each nite....haiz....*sniff* *sniff*....

2dae never do PFTl...sit down dere very the sianz....nth to do after writing postcard to eleanor....haiz...i have to retake wen i feel better...so sux....wa kau....sianz....haiz.....boring....boring....feel so sick and tired of living.....everything sux manz.....
2dae after school....went singapore post wif eleanor, waimin n liling...hahaz....we ordered family feast A and guess wat....hahaz....all those chicken drumsticks and wateva stuffs...onli eleanor and liling eat....hahahaahahahahahax!!!!...mi n waimin onli eat the side dishes....coz mi not reali feeling well ma....den....jokes started cracking and alot of laughters broke out lorz....very funi la....hahahz....
this saturday got band.....mi 100% not going no matter wat....i dun care....mi not going thats mean not going....

haiz...im sick....

haiz....i got fever....lucky today no band....haiz....or else mi hafway in band sick....haiz...i cannot get myself sick anymore....i reali got to take good care of myself....haiz....
im gona be like a stone 4 a week!!!!.....cannot take any physical exercise 4 a week plus lorz......coz i hurt my backbone.....so sux.....haiz....mi one day never do exercise very de xin ku de....haiz....i duno how m i gona survive 4 the next few weeks....haiz...i sux....haiz....mi have ya postpone my PFT.....haiz....till i recover le den i can do....then i have yar do during my PE wif the failures....haiz....so bored.....haiz....life indeed sux 4 mi......=(

haiz....juz now went to the library and write blog lorz....den write hafway my account log out itself lorz....saying my account not enough cash!!!....hahaz....i onli got about 6mins to surf the net mahz....
waaa!!!!...2dae got mircale happen worlx.....ms lim suddenly praise the whole band worlx....hahahz....sae until we people are so great like tat worlx....waaa!!!....sae wat our sch rely on the band so much worlx...hahaz....hmmm....reali???....haiz....
neway im skipping band this week if there's any band n maybe again next tuesday....coz i reali have to take care of myself....my health is much much more important than band...after so much stress i have put in...and even getting myself sick during band performance rite...i still sit dere n play....haiz...so is like even i sick rite....i still do alot of things and never rest enough....even grace, my senior...also wana scold mi lorz....so now...everything is over...i wana to have a break....i got a weaker health at home actually....ok...franky speaking...im still sick....realli....haiz....im gona write a letter to ms johnson n tell her...haiz.....

2dae....im turning 14...im not prepared...stress...sick.....tats wat im feeling now....feeling all alone....life indeed sux.....sux....i juz wana die now n 4get everything lorz....got alot of things to worry....haiz...
actually....i fell sick this morning....i feel so weak all over mi....dun have the strength to play de....but i still pia go....haiz....have to the la....scare the horn section mahz....go la....no mood at all.....hahaz...grace so-called like 'scold mi lorz'...coz mi cannot make it i still continue to pia.....in the end...i get myself sick again....haiz...thanz grace...wo hui ting hua de.....haiz...gona miss your words.....haiz....gona miss u all sec4s....haiz....
reali wana thank all those presents my frens have give....reali like them alot....
thanx lorz....haiz.....
....Monday......9 August 2004........11:49pm........

i have no mood 4 anything...tml is my birthday....i should be happy rite...then tml my mum allow mi to go out wif my frens...to celebrate my birthday...but i duno why...i dun reali have the mood lorz...i duno why....iszit becoz of some unforgetable past or wat...i reali duno wat to sae....n i dun wana remember.....i juz wana 4get it....juz 4get it....
i slept very early yesterday....8.30 i found myself on the bed....very sad...n tired....so decided to sleep early lor....to prevent myself frm thinking too much....haiz....
tml got the NDP performance in the morning at BOON KENG....very the scared lorz...we dun reali have much practice lorz.....scared the whole band cannot make it....very the scared....haiz...hope that we can make it.....
......Sunday........8 August 2004........07:51am.......

Thankgiving today....so-so lorz....we played 'Happy Birthday, Singapore'....'Ballad'--> Tone Studies....'Home'......'The Awakening'.....'Fan-fare...The Olympic Spirit'......' The Next Octave'.....' Crown Him With Many Crowns'.....hmm....yaya.....kind of scared.....but overcome it later.....
Went bugis after tat....wif judith...songying...marilyn...seemun...n waimin....we went to catch a movie....-->' The Village'...the show kind of lame la...not reali that interesting....so-so lorz.... but hor….the backup music ver the nice lor…..got a lot of horn sound….very soothing……if I can can tat well…..’tian pa xia lai’…….hahaz…. haf way through the show...judith suddenly tell mi tat she n songying 4get to take their saxophone....then the chair we sat on sudden got vibration….n it’s frm behind mi…..turn behind n look there’s no1….wakau…..which idiot wan 2 scare us huh…..go n die la……
den songying panic yet judith remain calm....yaya....later after the movie...we immediately called the taxi hotline.....ya....songying use my name to call the taxi lorz....then she sae the driver sae "ying yin ah...u so careless..."-->i think so la.....eh....use my name....:@....joking here.....not angry la......after tat.....we went to meet tat uncle.....he ask we all to go n meet him 20mins later as he's now at WOODLANDS!!! ON MY GOD!!! make that uncle waste his trip on us frm woodlands to bugis lolx....judith wana give him tips but he rejected....suck a good guy.....
later....we went to buy present then go n take neoprint....2 machines onli la....yaya....ok lorz....mi dull....sunken-looking face again....the face.....wen i almost breakdown that time....sad over sumthing....i rejected sumthing....i try not to remember the past.....i try to put it aside.....4eva.....i will try.....my......very best.......i promise.....
i almost died.....almost died in a car accident....lucky the driver is not speeding.....he almost knocked mi down.......almost.......
i dun reali have to mood to do anything.....
......Saturday.......7 August 2004.......07:30pm......

im fell sick all of a sudden....when i reach the kallang theatre....duno la....feel very giddy n i feel like puking....later....alicia brought mi to the toilet n i puke a little out....i thought i will feel ok wan but...i duno why i feel more worst... my vision was kind of blur....cant look straight....haiz.....headache xia....
My section....n trombone n bass clarinet and sum clarinets share a room....the dressing rm very the small lorzx....but at the back wan rite....the room more big lorz.....haiz...ms johson dun allow us to go inside.....sae wat she will make the rm haunted.....yayaya...wadeva....
i never play 4 the rehearsal....i went to the audience seat n listerning wif alicia....she suddenly feel bad also....i went to tell ms johnson le....
at least we got the chance to hear our band play....starting is kind of odd...the percussion dun reali sound so good...the sound very the fake n sounds like plastic lorz....haiz....mr ng dun reali looks very good.....his face turn black.....haiz....
i think i gona go sleep le la....juz now wen i reach my house the stairs tat time...i almost faint lorz....frm behind!!....yaya....scary....mi duno how m i gona do if i reali juz fall.....i may not be around tml 4 the performance le....kk....touch wood....hahaz.....kk.....bye bye
......Friday.......6 August 2004......10:34pm.......

im fell sick all of a sudden....when i reach the kallang theatre....duno la....feel very giddy n i feel like puking....later....alicia brought mi to the toilet n i puke a little out....i thought i will feel ok wan but...i duno why i feel more worst... my vision was kind of blur....cant look straight....haiz.....headache xia....
My section....n trombone n bass clarinet and sum clarinets share a room....the dressing rm very the small lorzx....but at the back wan rite....the room more big lorz.....haiz...ms johson dun allow us to go inside.....sae wat she will make the rm haunted.....yayaya...wadeva....
i never play 4 the rehearsal....i went to the audience seat n listerning wif alicia....she suddenly feel bad also....i went to tell ms johnson le....
at least we got the chance to hear our band play....starting is kind of odd...the percussion dun reali sound so good...the sound very the fake n sounds like plastic lorz....haiz....mr ng dun reali looks very good.....his face turn black.....haiz....
i think i gona go sleep le la....juz now wen i reach my house the stairs tat time...i almost faint lorz....frm behind!!....yaya....scary....mi duno how m i gona do if i reali juz fall.....i may not be around tml 4 the performance le....kk....touch wood....hahaz.....kk.....bye bye
......Friday.......6 August 2004......10:34pm.......

wa!!!!!!so embrass 2dae lorz.....darm embrass lor...waimin....siewhua...liling.....valarie.....jiamin....bought a HUGE TEDDY BEAR 4 mi lorlx...n 2dae got mass PE lorz...walau...carry the bear here n there...people keep on staring at mi....so piaseh....Mr LIM saw it lorz....n he ask hu's birthday???....piaseh xia!!!!.....
tml very the scared lorz....got performance lorz....so scared....coz mi abot sick....stress xia....lucky my horn is alrite....phew!!!.....=p
Thursday.....5 August 2004......05:01pm....

shit shit shit!!!!.....juz now wen i got home....at 2nd storey tat time....i suddenly black out n my whole horn went down the stairs!!!....den i check the horn....it's ok la...lucky no problem....but i scared got den...then will affect the sound.....shit la.....i die le la.....sure die de la......:'(
yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!so hapi!!!!!!!!!i no need to sae the reflection anymore!!!!so hapi....hahaz.....yeah!!!!!!!!!so hapi!!!!!!!!!!!!hahahz.....
i went swee lee again after school.....i feel like as if im the delivery women to swee lee....hahaz....this few weeks keep on going there.....hahaz....sianz....
tml....finally no band.....phew!....finally i can take a break....but i got bring my horn home today la...so sumtimes have to practice....maybe later.....now rest a while....haiz....sianz...
WAAA!!!...the wat "Happy Birthday, Singapore' hor....the notes reali 'HIGH" worlx.....hahahz.....play finish the song le rite....have to go n catch my breath...phew.....u c.....now i got problem going in2 the MSN....walau....everytime like tat....sickening....walau....dun do this to mi la......let mi go on la.....haiz....
Hehex....2dae is my chinese birthday....hehex!!!(",).....i treat waimin n songying a drink after band.....hehez...hahaz....so hapi....
hmm.....now listerning to Fate Of The Gods.......hehez
Wednesday......4 August 2004.....08:48pm.........

haiz....2dae....mr ng kind of unhappy lorz...keep on picking darren juz becoz he cant reach the 'A' lorz......plz lor....it's vry hard to reach lorz....den keep on scolding him lorz....haiz.....everytime when he is moody rite, he's vry fond of facing someone and scold wan....haiz....
band sux today.....mr ng got so much craps to say...yet drag the time till 6pm...walau....sux lorz....hate him la....
tml...i got to go swee lee and help a fren to send his flute....haiz...tml is my chinese birthday....i intent to go bugis wif my frens wan....haiz...i think...i juz have ya 4get it....nvm lorz....next time ba....i dun mind...
haiz....tml at 4pm got the NDP celebration rehesrsal lorz....sianz....den have to report at 3:15pm....haiz....sux.....sianz....very the bo liao....sianz....
Tuesday.....3 August 2004......11:17pm.....

hmm...today got Thankgiving Rehearsal.....haiz...sianz.....darren conduct today...so-so lorz...but sumtimes duno wat he conducting la....kind of blur....his hands keep on shivering....scared ba....
before the rehearsal....mi n grace went swee lee.....we pia lorz...juz to get back on time 4 the rehearsal....but hor wen mi reach dere hor....still got sum ppl playing basketball....wa lau....waste our strength.....we very hungry lorz.....den have to bear wif it......haiz.....
wa...today very the scary lorz.....coz...qabir has to go n report sumwhere coz he got an award to take lorz.....den darren has to conduct....so left mi alone dere....play the awakening.....scary lorz at the 1st part....horn have to play....den onli i play.....scared lorz.....shiver xia......
Rehearsal was fine 2dae.....abit bo liao.....abit sianz.....haiz....mi now listerning to Noah Ark's the recording....next will be Fate Of The Gods......hahaz.... horn solo now.....hehez....nice xia....hahaz......wadeva.....
tml got science remedial......haiz....so sianz......go band late again....haiz......tired......*yawn*....got alot of things to do....haiz......sec2 life is so tough......but juz have to pia!!!!......
Monday.....2 August 2004.......07:19pm.....